“Boxer Rebellion” – Underwear robbers plague North Bay

From: Philip St. George, thenorthbaybay.ca staff

NORTH BAY — The North Bay Police are asking the public not to panic following a string of “copycat robberies” which have featured robbers wearing underwear on their heads.

North Bay Police Inspector Calvin Hanes presided over a short briefing on the robberies Saturday afternoon.

“I can confirm that there have been several robbery attempts featuring individuals with underwear on their heads,” says Hanes. “The robbers appear to be part of a small group of thieves calling themselves ‘The Boxer Rebellion.'”

“This group is unorganized and is mostly made up of small time thieves jockeying for position.”

The most recent robbery took place on Saturday, May 25th at a Lakeshore business.

“A man wearing two coloured thongs on his head held up a Cash 4 Now yesterday because he felt he had been cheated by the store,” says Hanes. “It didn’t work and we caught him, which just goes to show you that two thongs don’t make a right.”

“A Pack of Morons”

Hanes wants to assure the city that they have nothing to fear from the “Boxer Rebellion.”

“To be brutally honest,” coughs Hanes, “they’re a pack of morons.”

“One of the robbers wore fishnets and another crotchless panties which entirely exposed his face. The most recent was caught with no mask or underwear at all.”

“We didn’t even think he was part of the Rebellion until he told us he was going ‘commando.'”

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