BREAKING: Topper’s Demands Greatest Pizza Recount!

From: Darren D. MacDonald, staff

NORTH BAY — After an intensive multi-day voting process, North Bay has chosen North Bay’s Greatest Pizza: the Algonquin location of Greco’s and it’s thinly sliced ham.

But the runner up just can’t accept defeat.

“I feel that this did not give Toppers a fair shake,” says local media manager Todd Preza. “By the time we got wind of it and I convinced upper management that they should care, it was over.”

Preza insists that Toppers does have the winning number of votes, but lost only due to a sort of “local bias”

“We demand a recount! With a closer inspection of the votes I’m sure Toppers won. Like, did they REALLY count? Did they include the votes for Toppers on the post that Greco’s shared?”

More Tomfoolery

“There’s no way we could lose,” continues Preza. “We have Girl Guide Cookies®. Are you telling me the people North Bay hates Girl Guide Cookies®?!”

While Preza insists “some sort of tomfoolery” occurred when counting the votes, the results were clear: Greco’s won by a landslide. 

“I think the results were tainted by who was voting. Many said that Toppers wasn’t local and Greco’s was. That’s fake news!”

“Topper’s was founded in Sudbury! North Bay? Sudbury? Basically the same thing!”

The North Bay Bay takes this accusation seriously and WOULD look into a recount, but who’s got the time?

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