Council commissioning study on the studying of studies

From: Darren D. MacDonald, thenorthbaybay.ca

NORTH BAY — There are things that North Bay is known for: shadflies, payday loan stores, and toilet-shaped buildings.

But now North Bay has one more thing to add to its “Known for” list – Studies.

A recent study by a local study group revealed that last year’s studies are currently being studied by a special group of “Study Studiers” to see if the studies are valid or need more studies to root out any flaws in the studies.

“It’s weird,” says local Studier Jake McCloud. “Last year there was a compiled list of North Bay studies. We were studying the study to see if the study was effective and we found out through all the information that our study studies were being studied by an external study group.”

“This means that all the studies, and study studies over the past couple of years have been studied by some… study studier group.”

McCloud is using this as proof that the multitude of studies conducted in North Bay over the last few years must be important, and not the product of indecisive politicians set on wasting time and money.

“I think all this studying is good,” says North Bay City Council Member Tony Jericho. “How can studies not be good? They create jobs, they can give us time to think about what the study is about, and they give us information to ignore.”

“And not to brag, but we are amazing at ignoring reports. That Baylor Report? We ignored the shit out of that one!”

Another Study Commissioned

The study on studiers studying studies is an unexpected turn of events for the study groups of North Bay.

“With the new information about this study of our studies coming to light, there is only one thing for a study group to do,” smiles McCloud. “Study! So today, I’m happy to announce that City Council has financed another study in which we, the study studiers, are going to be studying the studier study group to see which studies we should be studying in order to study the study study. Study study study the study. Stuuuudddyyy. Study?”

The North Bay Bay will keep you updated as the study studying study group studies the “study” study to see if studying the study will help study studies pay off.

“And this study is a bargain too,” says McCloud. “It’s only going to cost taxpayers some $250 000.”

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