North Bay to Turn Sidewalks Into Skating Rinks

From: XIII, contributor

NORTH BAY — Winter is upon us. The relentless, unforgiving coldness of Demeter’s wrath has fallen upon our city – or that’s how some people view our harsh northern winters. Others, like North Bay citizen Jed Tomkie, look at winter as a season of opportunity.

Tomkie is the catalyst for a project that will make travelling through the City of North Bay both more fun and more interesting.

“You know, if you just run a Zamboni over the sidewalks, you can have a full-fledged skating rink,” explained Tomkie at a recent City Hall meeting. “Imagine: innocent children and massive hockey players alike just givin‘er on the sidewalks.”

Tomkie’s Vision

Tomkie related the rest of his vision for the future, which includes designated hockey, ringette and figure skating areas, and even tiny Tim Hortons stands for citizens to be able to stop at and chug down a double-double between plays.

“It’d be fun for the whole family!” continued Jed. “Sports teams would flourish! There’d be just as many hockey rings as there are prostitution rings in the city.  Plus… tourism!”


With the mention of tourism, City Council immediately began to warm to the idea.

“I can see it now: ‘North Bay – Home of Sidewalk Hockey,” beamed Councillor Vic Tikus. “That Jed Tomkie is going places.”

Steps have already being taken since the meeting, and a variety of Tim Hortons franchise owners are already claiming to be on board.

“I would be happy to help out,” promised Tim Hortons owner Jonie Dupont. “But only as long as Blackpot isn’t in charge of maintaining the ice.”

“We don’t need our kids getting as bashed up as the underside of our cars due to our poorly maintained roads.”

But elsewhere, the owner of Blackpot has already begun looking into buying a Zamboni, and is showing more enthusiasm for the project than anything else (especially road maintenance).

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