Nipissing Plaza celebrates 700th pothole

From: Philip St. George, staff

NORTH BAY — The suspense was palpable and the suspensions were pulpable. Then it happened: sometime during the night, Nipissing Plaza developed its 700th pothole. 

“It’s a landmark occasion,” cheers Plaza owner Gabe Chase. “Now not only are we known for our high quality chain stores, but we have now firmly solidified the Plaza’s reputation as one of the worst parking lots in all of the city!”

Gifts and Celebration

A full celebration was held shortly after the new pothole’s creation, with its discoverer being awarded gifts from the Plaza’s many stores.

“I was coming in to buy some paint from Home Hardware and drove right into it,” explains Brent Cook. “It was deep enough to seriously damage my suspension, but at least I got this cake, I guess.”

In addition to a free cake from Metro, Cook also received one tall boy from The Beer Store and a gift bag from Value Village.

“It’s actually just one of those clear bags full of random wires,” frowns an ungrateful Cook.

The 700th pothole

All prizes were donated by Speedy Auto Service.

“I’m not lying when I say that the Nipissing Plaza parking lot has single-handedly been keeping us in business,” smiles Speedy Auto mechanic Nate Merrill. “So, here’s to the next 700 potholes! May they never be filled so that my pockets can be!”

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