Memorial Gardens getting $12 million retractable canvas roof

From: Jennifer Hanson, staff

NORTH BAY – The crack of a stick on the ice – the thwap! of a puck hitting the net – the glare of the sun in the opposition’s eyes… these are the dreams of Memorial Gardens Manager Stephen Boyle.

Boyle is spearheading a campaign to earmark $12.2 million to add a retractable roof to Memorial Gardens.

The pop top idea came shortly after it was revealed that new Covid-19 restrictions would limit Battalion games to a maximum admittance of 1000 fans.

“Ol’ MG can hold 4,262 and we want every seat available,” explains Boyle. “Sure, we usually only get 800 or so in for most games, but just imagine how amazing it would be to watch the Battalion skate out as hundreds of seagulls hover overhead waiting for your popcorn!”

Boyle grins.

“Plus, with a retractable roof we could finally use live ammunition to salute our brave OHL players!”

“Pow! Pow pow POW!”

Roof Top Decisions

Boyle’s proposition is due before City Council Tuesday night, where it is expected to pass unanimously.

“I love it!” smiles Councillor Grey Terrence. “We really, really messed up the last renovation to the Gardens – so much so that transports can’t back in anymore to unload for shows or concerts.”

“But with a retractable roof, that will all be solved. Nickleback can just fly in their helicopter!”

Terrence thinks the conversation will center around what to build to retractable roof out of.

“I think we should have a nice black canvas top like my 1991 Pontiac Trans Am convertible,” says Terrence. “But no matter what, I think we can all agree that another $12 million on Memorial Gardens is money well spent.”

In related news, former mayoral candidate Will Boissoin was admitted to the hospital with an erection that lasted longer than 6 hours. 

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