The North Bay Bay

From: Jennifer Hanson, thenorthbaybay.ca staff

OTTAWA — Vic Fedeli may be many things, but Sam Oosterhoff he is not.

“I’ve been getting a lot of heat lately,” says Fedeli. “And I know there are a small, vocal, teacher-deceived minority that have been accusing me of not being an upstanding MPP. But to them, I say this – at least I’m not Sam Oosterhoff.”

Niagara West MPP Sam Oosterhoff took the stage at an anti-abortion rally in Toronto on Thursday, where he cheerfully declared that he didn’t know the difference between a child and a fetus.

Oosterhoff was joined by fellow Conservative MPPs Christina Mitas and Will Bouma.

To weigh in on this potential blunder from the political opposition, The North Bay Bay attempted to contact Local MP Anthony Rota for comment, but could not locate him. In fact, Rota hasn’t been seen in several months, leading some to believe he has found a way to become invisible. If found, please call 1-202-555-0107.

Happy Fedeli

But Fedeli is happy to be out of the spotlight.

“I mean, sure I’ve kinda given up on getting back the Northlander train,” says Fedeli. “And sure, I’ve kinda fallen flat on the Ring of Fire, and ok, maybe I’ve been abusing the word ‘fearmongering,’ and all right, perhaps I’ve had a hand in several cuts and have denigrated teachers, held private, donation-only luncheons, and made cuts to libraries; but at least I haven’t attending anti-abortion rallies and calling the police on old people.”

On the topic of Oosterhoff’s support for his staff calling the police on a small group of senior citizens staging a “read in” inside Oosterhoff’s office, Fedeli says he would never kick the elderly out.

“I want to go on record as saying old people with books are welcome in my office anytime,” says Fedeli. “And for a small donation of $1000 or so, I’d even invite them to lunch.”