Election signs to create 3 story homeless shelter

From: Darren D. MacDonald, thenorthbaybay.ca

NORTH BAY — Election signs. With every campaign comes a deluge of election signs, but what happens after the election is finished and the winners have been picked?

Well, wonder no more.

In a landmark agreement, spearheaded by local Environmental Activist Tad Willis, all the North Bay candidates for City Council and Mayor have to come together for a greater cause: recycling their election signs into a house for the homeless.

“The papers have been signed!” exclaimed an ecstatic Tad Willis early Wednesday morning. “On the 22nd of October, all the remaining election signs will be gathered and used in the construction of a house where the homeless can stay. The entire building will be made out of election signs, and election signs alone.”

With donations from businesses around the city, the signs will be pressed, melted, bent, and molded into a 3 story, 2.5 bathroom house located on Cassells Street.

“This will surely solve the homeless problem in North Bay,” says Willis. “And it will also give that ugly house with all the stuff in the yard some competition.”

The election sign house has found support not only with hopeful candidates, but also with the current Council and Mayor.

“Oh, the election sign house?” responded Mayor Al McDonald when ambushed in the City Hall elevator. “Yeah, uh, it’ll work out. Better than it in the dump, I guess. I mean, the dump costs money, so I guess everyone wins.”

“It was no easy task to get all the signatures,” explains Tad Willis. “We had to chase down Al while he was jogging, catch Maroosis while he was sleeping, and it took us a while to find Boissoin under the Memorial Gardens bleachers.”

Willis shivers.

“I don’t really want to talk about what he was doing down there.”

“We finally got Neal McNamara when he stopped to rest after successfully planting more election signs than people in North Bay,” says Willis.

“The rest we just faked.”

Following the election, the shelter looks to be finished by November 25th, 2018.

Feel free to share!