Black market flu shots a booming business

From: Darren D. MacDonald, staff

NORTH BAY — Fall is the air, which means that flu season is right around the corner.  However, with the added caution of the Virus Who Will Not Be Named, flu shots are becoming harder and harder to get.  

“Waiting rooms are crowded and almost everywhere requires an appointment,” explains Dr. Jenna Burke. “Most places are booking appointments well into mid-November.”

This 2 to 4 week wait time has some families looking to get the flu shot elsewhere.

“I’m a freelance PSW,” begins an anonymous North Bay mother. “I hardly know my schedule for next week, let alone a month from now. I’d ask for time off to get the shot along with my family, but my boss REALLY hates treating their workers like people.”

“So it’s black market flu shots for me and the kids.”

To The Highest Bidder

The North Bay Buy and Sell hosts a horde of people advertising homemade flu shots.

“These shots are not safe,” warns Dr. Burke. “There’s no inactive virus in them. Hell, most are just watered down essential oils, cider vinegar and turmeric!”

Elsewhere, others are auctioning off their own flu shot appointments.

“Sure, I want my flu shot, but right now the top bid for it is at $50!” writes one man with an actual flu shot appointment. “I’m doing the public a service. I’m like the noble ticket scalper, and everyone remembers how Doug Ford struck down that anti-scalping law. So if you think about it, I’m basically provincially endorsed.”

The Health Unit is telling citizens to be patient, and that anyone who wants the flu shot can get one. It will just take a bit longer.

However, if you haven’t booked your flu shot yet and would like one ASAP, please email [email protected] for prompt, courteous service at a very reasonable price.

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