The North Bay Bay

From: Darren D. MacDonald, thenorthbaybay.ca staff

NORTH BAY – Amber Alerts are a way of informing the public of a missing child. When a child is missing, every minute matters and the more people aware of the situation, the more people can keep an eye out and report sightings.

Most people see Amber Alerts as a useful tool, but assholes see it as a reason to complain to 911.

But no asshole was as annoyed as much as this asshole.

Last night Jake Manning was woken by an alert on his phone. It was an Amber Alert for his own kid, and Manning was furious.

“What kind of world are we living in where a man can’t even get 8 hours of sleep per night?!” yells Manning. “That alarm went off at 3 am! What am I going to do? Get up and go looking for my kid?! Hell no. I’ll wake up at 7am, like a normal human, have my coffee and then get to it.”

Manning sentiments are shared by many others across the province. These assholes like to call 911 (a number there for emergencies) and complain to the dispatcher (someone doing too important of a job to listen to assholes) about the Amber Alert (an emergency warning system designed to quickly help find missing children).

Police Response

Police are asking the public to not be assholes and to not call 911 because they are personally annoyed by something.

A recent twitter post from the North Bay Police Department politely asked anyone annoyed by Amber Alerts to “write the complaint on a piece of paper, go to the washroom and shove it up your #dumbass.”

Manning Still Mad

While the search goes on for his son, Jake Manning remains annoyed.

“You know what happened to me when I went missing as a kid?” growls Manning. “I got my ass whooped, that’s what. And I turned out fine. Might do my boy some good to learn the same lesson if they find him.”

“Now if you excuse me, I’m going to finish this beer and go harass some 911 dispatchers over the phone.”