Harris Learning Library Converted into Regulation Hockey Rink

From: Nora D. Shadsworth, thenorthbaybay.ca staff NORTH BAY — Patrons and staff of the Harris Learning Library were taken by surprise Sunday morning when they found that most of the library’s collection had been removed, ice-making equipment had been installed, and the entire first floor of the library had been converted into an NHL-sized hockey […]

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City vows to win next year’s Code of Silence Awards

From: Philip St. George and Rooster Cogburn, thenorthbaybay.ca NORTH BAY — An “honourable mention” for the 2019 Code of Silence Awards was not enough. “We want to be #1,” says an unnamed, fully masked City Councillor. “Nobody on council is happy with the result, so starting immediately we’re going to get even more secretive.” The […]

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Canadore changes slogan to “Just Sweep It Under the Rug”

From: Jennifer Hanson, thenorthbaybay.ca staff NORTH BAY — Canadore College is looking to a “brighter, happier” future. Ken Garrett, Head of Canadore’s Public Relations, announced the College would be changharassing its official slogan from “Great Things Happen Here” to “Just Sweep It Under the Rug” to fit with the College’s new, “more carefree,” focus on […]

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Canadore gives up, bans all women from campus

From: Jennifer Hanson, thenorthbaybay.ca staff NORTH BAY — Following allegations of sexual harassment, misconduct, bullying, and gender discrimination, Canadore College has decided to ban all women from its campus. The ban will take effect April 2nd, with all current female employees being terminated and all female students being removed from their programs. “We have seen […]

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North Bay decides to just make everyone a contract worker

From: Philip St. George, thenorthbaybay.ca staff In a stunning move, North Bay City Council has used its unilateral, indisputable power to declare that all jobs in North Bay will be contract only. “I think it’s only fair” Councillor Vic Tikus said Wednesday. “We’ve been watching the College strike and thinking ‘who the hell do these […]

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