City motto changed to ‘North Bay: You’ll Get Used To It’”

From: Darren D. MacDonald, thenorthbaybay.ca

NORTH BAY — Calling a surprise press conference yesterday morning, North Bay Mayor Al McDonald announced that the city of North Bay would be changing its official city motto.

“We want to show that North Bay is moving forward in the world,” began McDonald. “And that North Bay listens to their citizens. Like everything I, Mayor Al McDonald do, I do bold, and I do with ballz… with a ‘Z.’ Therefore, I am hereby changing North Bay’s official city motto from ‘Gateway to the North’ to ‘North Bay: You’ll Get Used To It.’”

Before any questions could be asked Mayor Al McDonald dropped his mic. He then proceeded to snatch any microphones the media had, recording or not, and dropped them all as well.

But while McDonald was clearly excited, others were not so happy.

Mayoral candidate Gary Philip Gardiner had some very strong words for Mayor Al McDonald.

“I think that this decision is not needed at this current time,” says Gardiner. “And while I respect the big bold balls of Mayor Al McDonald, I think he should tone it down a bit, if he wouldn’t mind.”

Al’s Interview

We reached out to Al McDonald, who granted The North Bay Bay an exclusive interview.

“I did research,” says McDonald. “With the setup of the Wifi park we have gained unfiltered access to everyone’s content. That includes phone calls, text messages and social medias like Facebook, Twitter, and Tinder.”

“You know what we found out? The overwhelming, reoccurring theme of everyone’s communications is that you can’t change North Bay; you will only get used to it.”

“Also, that the key to Tinder is to have 3 to 5 pictures, with at least one of them showing your whole body. Also, the be honest about what you’re looking for, a little bit humourous, and to only swipe right on people your are really, truly interested in.

“I’m sorry – what were we talking about?”

Still, the question remains: will this bold, ballzy move from Mayor Al McDonald help him secure the position of Mayor of North Bay again, or will this decision result in a new mayor?

More on this news as it swipes right.

Feel free to share!